Moving on from dreams to things that literally go bump in the night. While reading this next story please bear in mind I have always been severely classically autistic with a side serving of aloofness. I was undiagnosed autistic until I was 39, so try to imagine a boy who thinks differently to everyone around him but has no clue as to why this is. As a side note, since my diagnosis I have often gone back into my memories and tried to imagine what life would have been like if I was diagnosed sooner.
There was a thinly veiled school trip in year 8 to Durham, Lindisfarne, & the Farne Islands. Officially it was a Religious Education exercise but only Mrs A was interested in that. It was adventure, history, & female classmates I was interested in. We stayed at Hatfield College, the main block next door to the dining hall. It must have been during a College semester break as the regular student rooms were turned over to us. On a previous trip to Northumberland I had been able to choose my roommates but no such luck this time. As an interjection here, I will point out that at the time I was completely friendless so if I had been given the opportunity it might have been worse.
The teacher paired me with a student vastly different from myself. Eddie was kind, he was funny, & he was popular. I was out of my depth. After my parent’s divorce I retreated into myself – which was then worsened by a difficult transition into secondary school. I was not equipped to navigate the difficult social world of secondary education. A fact that I was completely naive to in my adolescent mind, I was like a dog chasing parked cars.
On the same trip were many of the girls with whom I was infatuated. Yes plural and yes puerile I know I know, but my mind never stretched beyond holding hands and falling in love. They however nearly saw me in all my glory, if it wasn’t for the underwear that I chose to wear that night in deference to my roommate. In the daytime we were treated to the local sites like Durham Cathedral, Lindisfarne Abbey, & a boat trip round the Farne Islands. Which are on my list to revisit but I digress, we were following the lives of the founding fathers of Christianity in Northern England. The night was ours to do as we pleased, although being only 11 the options were pretty limited.
For me the best option was an early night ready for the next morning. Eddie however was more outgoing. We didn’t have much in common so the following unusual occurrence provided a welcome talking point. Our dorm room had a space heater, which we couldn’t figure out how to turn on. It looked like it was from several generations previous. It had been painted with thick matt paint and it was where the noise came from. At first there were the normal drips, clicks, & clunks associated with old pipework. However then it began to let out a distinctive otherworldly growl. It had to be the heater, because if it wasn’t then what the double hockey sticks was it?
This aggressive growl went on night after night, I was scared but Eddie was amused. He saw it as an attraction. Sure enough our room became the focus of attention for the trip. Then it happened, I was laid in bed and all of a sudden the covers were lifted high into the air. The explanation for this wasn’t paranormal but the hijinks of mischievous schoolgirls, looking to see what I was wearing beneath the covers. Like I said, thank goodness I had my pants on. The bullying was bad enough without my privates being on display.
Despite the fear in that moment, I believe it was a bright spot in what was a dark time of my childhood. Perhaps another time I will tell you all about it. With the exposure wasn’t the ridicule I feared but instead a rare moment of being in on a joke as well as the butt of it. The growl never turned into anything sinister, just a curious noise that in the cold light of day might have been less frightening. Thanks for reading and please share if this has jogged any personal memories for yourself.
